Sir Maledoric Journeys to The Autumn Tourney in Normandie

The modest train of an Alfgrimnean Knight Errant arrives near the tourney grounds.  It is late, and the air is misty, offering no solace.  Boots are changed and dried near the fire.  Dogs are beaten.  The soup pot swings out over the fire, and a rich broth of salamander bones and kappa heads is started, with local mushrooms (not as stout as the cook is used to but one must not complain, for St. Roch listens for complaints).  The baggage cart is loaded with heavily spiced foods and gifts for the tournament organizers, pewter flagons and ornate China-ware flasks of rare poisonous perfumes.

Maledoric's Heraldry

 "We journeyed through Thrend, observing the Keep of the dead wizard Halthrag.  My master sent me to make contact with a lawyer in Marbourg, nearby, in the matter of a patent upon a clockwork pleasure doll.  I find the place intolerably boring, and devoid of the picturesque charm of similar places in, say, Averoigne.  The River Nymphs there are as fetching as I'd heard but they were leery of our advances and we could not coax them with jewels or perfumes.  And I spotted the spoor of a Manticore; an adult I would wager it.

I have journeyed far through the mists to take part in these noble tests, to corrupt the noble of spirit, to debauch, and to subtly spread the worship of Roch the Plague Saint (the guise of the hideous nether god Nevrovolant that lives far beneath the surface of Averoigne)

I bring in tow the wastrels Muraude, Hambline, Guretch, and Vreltz - these men are of no account and search for orphans and women of low character to bring into our cult.  There is also Albert d' Boruche, a deep-gnomish cook who is prone to use partly poisonous mushrooms in his cuisine.  He is often besotted, and is said to be an emasculate

Then there is Tiberthe, my aide and acolyte and squire - liberated from the Serpent Men of Golaire.  He hates the Catholic orthodoxy and all Lawful Holy Men.

Wormwood is my trusty, flea-bitten hound.  A million fleas and he gives a few to each man he passes!  Wormwood is the most generous of all dogs, for he gives and gives and gives and gets only beatings and rotten turnips in return.  An occasional haunch rabbit, of course, although he often has trouble distinguishing hobbettes from rabbits.  Of no consequence.

I ride Gurailtz, a thing in the rough shape of a horse, with scaly skin, beady reptilian eyes, a whip-like tail, and a preference for elfin flesh in the morning and Belladonna wine before he beds down at night.

Find me in the woods, seeking out Amanitas and the trail of the King of the Forest - it's said he has a spell to grant for those who will bring him pens and ink.  I raised the ire of the Lord of the Hunt some weeks ago and so must avoid the outdoors at night.  I generally keep to my tent then, pining over the eldest nameless woman in the retinue of a noble knight that competed here in the summer.  Seek me out for perverse religious knowledge, twisted from the Latin Vulgate of the Sorcerer Jerome."

Knight Name: Sir Maledoric Goreson

Player Name: Noah Stevens

Class/Level: Cleric/2 (XP 2290 in LLAEC, but played again in DCC)

HP: 9

AC: 3 base(5 modified)

Str: 15

Int: 16

Wis: 10     LUCK: 10 (DCC)

Dex: 6      AGI:6 (DCC)

Con: 11     STA:11 (DCC)

Cha: 15     PER:15 (DCC)

Horse: Gurailtz, A reptilian demiwolf (A heavy warhorse)

Armor Worn: Plate, yellow dragon and chalice themes (plate was won in the last tourney)

Shield Type: Wooden Kite Shield

Armed with a meteoric iron broad sword, an envenomed kris, and an obsidian mace

 

The Table of Lost Dreams

(this was supposed to go in The LasRifle and Crowquill, my wargaming blog, but it didn't work out that way, so here you go:)

Been playing with the Beer and Bolters guys. Rekindled my excitement for winter projects, and before I go buying anything new I need to settle for finishing the shiznit I have on my plate already

As in, this some of this shiznit right here:

What you see is a bunch of IG (Cadians and Old Plastic Catachans), 2 squads of sisters, and a wacky mob of possible Inquisitorial retinue figs, the likes of which I forgot I had. The retinue boxed set was pretty spendy - seemed like at the time it was wasted money since nobody was really up for games where I was

Now, though, this retinue would absolutely work to put a dent in a certain cult of Nurgle worshipping motherfuckers that aren't fit to breath the air of this our fine planet. And like I was easing into play again real slow, but the way I had my ass handed to me the other day was mildly embarrassing and I hope Dave won't hold my inebriation nor my lack of skill against me since O how the brain circuits forget.

Here's an up close of the retinue (all the bases covered if I throw in the psy-cannon wielding grey knight as an acolyte - not sure if this is legit but with the psyocculum the retinue alone would hit psykers pretty seriously).

Last night I removed the plasma-cannon from the turret mount and am now ready to magnetize that puppy for ease of switcheroo-ing

Flee in Terror, Heretic!  now warm up the blessed promethium tanks, Muggins!  Although I love my DA successor chapter (still only The Nameless after 3 different rules sets) it feels like maybe time to concentrate on making the IG table-worthy.  I have maybe 6 10-man infantry squads worth of figs - I bet that if I could just FINISH PAINTING THEM ALL, that'd be great.  One squad of Ogryn and some rough riders would finish me off. Maybe another Leman Russ and a couple of Armored Sentinels. But that's it.

Maybe some shock troops or whatever they call them these days.  Yeah. Maybe Yarrick.  Man that would be terrific.  More tea, more time, and more money and I'm set.  And one of those shooty things at airplanes, and maybe a Valkyrie.

7th Edition Growing on Me

I played Rogues Trader long ago, had a 2K vanilla marines army in 2nd edition but was more a Necromunda guy.  My IG and Sisters and DA are all geared in 5th. So I never played 3,4, or 6

I was skeptical about a new edition but the mission cards and psychic phase are appealing. The rules for flyers seem to me easily abused but add an interesting variable to the game.

I like it, and it helps I have some pretty voracious and relaxed (in most ways) gamers to play with.

Listening to the Beer and Bolters 40K podcast - these are the guys I've been learning again with. Nice guys. The beer doesn't help me learn any, though.

new objectives: next year, creep up on the Genestealer Cult. This'll mean stripping the termagants and GS I already have painted in lurid pink. I can't recall ever stripping 30-40 models at once but I bet I could manage it. This year, finish painting and basing and working out the kinks with the figs I already have. Some minor purchases for Codices and maybe some vehicles (also I'm keen on Ogryns)

Although I had my ass whipped handily by Dave yesterday (daemon scum!) I recognize mostly I could have turned it around with a little effort and knowledge. I don't know the rules for the IG orders anymore, and I bottled a couple of big shooty squads up. Didn't use the armies to its strengths at all.

I'll fix that next time.  Also, I'm rusty on the lingo S5 AP2 rending heavy

The code doesn't come to me easily anymore.  I need a command squad for the IG and maybe some more Ogryn (conversions from fantasy would be cool)

We ended the game yesterday with a melee between my Nork and the Nurgle Warlord that was transformed into a Chaos Spawn in the fervor of killing my Inquisitorial Chaplain in h2h. Nork pulled the thing's tentacles off summarily and pummeled it into submission with the butt of his assault cannon.

There's potential.

Beer and Breath Weapons

Fie I say on the Burning Brand of Scartholax

Painted to death by flying flamer templates. Average death rate 5/6 well-heeled Dark Angels a turn

David deserves it with the points and modeling he put into this thing

Old terrain is the best terrain. Honor thy forebears and smite the mutant.

This is the first GW miniature I ever bought, and now I give it to Roy

May you summon 9 more at your whim, Dread Roy!

Reading, GREPping and Thinking and Viral Marketing

I got my sweet sweet little nubbins on the Lone Wolf Kickstarter rules. Checking those out now, Kai Initiate...

Prepping my 40K army for tomorrow with the Frederick Guys at "The Fang" - they are by far the funnest, beer drinkingest Sunday morning folks you'd ever hope to meet. I probably ought to finish painting, base-ing and do all that good jazz for them but anyways. Emperor Forgive me, But I grow weary of the purity seals and gleaming metal and square-jaws. I've said before that I'm going to switch over to collecting and painting a Genestealer Cult, and I will, maybe next spring a couple of pieces at a time.  the winds of money blow against me at this time...

The hard copy version of the Hounds of Halthrag Keep is pretty done - just need to GREP out a bunch of instances of text (they appear in the digital version) and update the digital files with the script I make, and submit the new version with in-line art onto RPGNow and Lulu. The question is, do I make the icons myself???! - there are only about 6 or 7 of them - or go with something that's out there already...

Also, I keep hearing snippets of the Halthrag Keep. I gave my working copy to the sister-in-law, who passed it on to the RPG club at her high school, and within a few moments it disappeared into the crowd and has not been seen again. Maybe those kids - and I know where they are mind you ;) - can get free digital comps if they like it. The thought of teen gamers finding all the little nooks and crannies of my unfinished work sort of makes me gleefully gleeful. As an exercise in learning the ins-and-outs, HHSOLO1 is still a work in progress. The good thing is, it will only take a couple more sales to become "profitable" but I already profited by 1) making it and 2) hearing some of the fun stories that guys have told me about playing it.

If you have absconded with my thing, young RPG burglar (not really, it was meant to disappear in exactly this way), then notify the members of your guild, and have your Guildmaster (One Ms. Pierogie?) send me your contact emails and earn yourself a stack of digital copies to use as you please.  Or, I guess, you could take a Century and photocopy all the bits you have and then spread 'em around, but I mean.  Do what you will, young lads and lasses.  I'm curious to know how you list.  Also, my teeth are like swords, my teeth are like ten-fold shields, uh, I dunno cumberbatch does it better than

OK - gotta sleep