I'm thinking about getting back into role-playing games after a 15 year-hiatus. I have kept up reading e.g. 4e D&D (blech) and some of the d20 source books (meh) and Chaosium's Call of Cthulhu but for the most part my gaming and hobby-type activity since, oh 1996, has been confined to WH40K and painting figs (maybe I can show some of my meager painting down the road). I have been inspired by the Old-School Revival e.g. Dungeon Crawl Classics, Labyrinth Lord, Mr. Greg Christopher's Ambitions and Avarice (which I have not yet played but some have seen it). Being somewhat a greybeard (started D&D around 1982) and somewhat busy with my job to find a suitable f2f game group, I've given some thought to looking for an online bunch to roll polyhedra with. That later. Right now, I am training for my first 5K race, replete with zombies and things to jump over. I have given some thought to making a L4D-model first aid pack to take with me, but it seems it could hold me back when I go over/under the barb wire. But it would be a good "on the go" cosplay. Hurr.
Why do I say this? Well, in the interests of adding back to the gaming community, I intend to post a series of ill-fated and star-crossed henchmen based on situations I find myself in. Pretty lame, eh? In the meantime, if you have any advice on how to find a good online gaming group (I prefer LL, DCC, Call of Cthulhu) or a nice batch of older gamers in the SoMD/DC/NoVA area, tap me here or whatnot. In the real world I do therapy at 6th level (my psychoanalysis skill is currently at 53%!), I am a bumbling photographer, and am preparing my metaphorical bugout bag for when the existential SHTF. You may find my older (more ranty, less RPG flavored) blog at noahms456.wordpress.com
Thanks for reading!
Hapless Henchman #1
Flens Flatfoot, 0 level normal human porter
Con 16, Dex 14
"Damn these shoes to the sixth circle of hell for their shoddy stitching! Yes, yes, young Master, just give me a moment to get the pack on, wait.... was that a manticore's bellow? Run!"
A grizzled old Imperial man who has made his way through the world by avoiding (narrowly) a long series of close encounters with danger. A henchman who often runs away is more often than not a pauper, however Flens differs from other hangers-on in that he has a keen ear and sense of smell, a quick tendency to run at the slightest provocation, and much better-than-average stamina for a man of his indeterminately elderly age. None of the parties he leaves with return, and none have ever spread word that he is a coward. His years of experience provide him with insight into the proper placement of iron rations to distribute the load across his (often aching) lower back, and the party's flagons and tin ladles make no noise in their straps. He estimates that he has struck out with 24 parties of various wide-eyed paladins, dwarves, acrobats, and barbarians, but Flens has yet to "strike it big". Although many a party he accompanied was destroyed outright, miraculously Flens' packs often contained the lightest goods, and pockets and compartments that were easily emptied when a quick burst of speed was required. Thus far he has lived out his life on the proceeds from the sales of scraps of various Cathayan silks and singed herbal spell components, the rightful owners of which have journeyed deep into the Barrowmaze, never to be seen again. The beermaids in the Cranky Hippogriff whisper that long ago Flens was raised by the desert-striding elves of Virthan but was banished for poor taste in music. He never complains outright about his load, but does mutter a litany of somatic complaints in the rear ranks (just out of earshot of his employer).
(any party he joins may benefit from a +3 to one member's move silent check once per game day. He will always fail a morale role if one is taken, and personally gains the benefit of expeditious retreat should he break from the party to flee.)